Pro Wrestling Chaos go to live iPPV for their first time with ‘Control, Alt, Delete’ ready to show the world their narratively and technically excellent product. Tim Ricketts was at ringside to report.
‘Country Big’ Josh Knott vs El Ligero – Dark Match
After appearing as a Mr Meeseeks in the Mystery Inter-dimensional Portal match last month, Josh Knott took the opportunity to introduce his Country Big style to the event crowd. His aspirations were soon derailed by Ligero’s tangential tactics however, with ‘The Mexican Sensation’ even using the bemused and perplexed Ref Huw as a personal substitute when Knott was busy posturing. This ended up with an amusingly confused situation where the official had the Devon youngster in a solid pin, so veteran Ligero delivered an appropriately brisk three count. It was not surprising that Knott failed to regain his rhythm after that, and Ligero quickly gave him his second taste of defeat for the night.
You know you’re in for a top evening if El Ligero doesn’t even get on the main card. A tidy little warm-up for the crowd.
Alex Steele vs Chuck Mambo
As the show went live on Powerbomb.tv, the injured ‘Pride of Wales’ Eddie Dennis — Chaos’ first double-crown champion — took to the microphone. He began by praising Chaos heavily as a company, not surprisingly considering the magnitude of the event, but every word of it was deserved. Not only do they provide one of the ‘hidden gems’ of BritWres (not anymore) in the ring, they look after their injured talent too. Switching seamlessly from passion to anger, Dennis directed his attention towards his tag-partner-turned-rival Alex Steele and current King of Chaos Matt Riddle. He desperately wants the title he lost in November back.
As Dennis settled himself in to the commentary position, alongside MC Rob Maltman and Merlin Obadiah Cambridge, Steele came out parading the crutch he used to turn on and beat the Welshman. Cornish surfer dude, Chuck Mambo, another returnee from the Portal match, received the hero’s welcome. After not having a Chaos match in a few months, Steele shook off an initial bit of ring-rust quickly, and the pair proceeded to have a solid, fast-paced and athletic bout. The turning point came when Steele retrieved his crutch: Ref Paz noticed it immediately, and disposed of it. Whilst his back was turned Steele smashed it’s twin, carefully stashed under the ring, into Mambo’s head and back. A nefarious win for the 1980’s-influenced former Knight of Chaos really underlines his heelish volte-face.
Crazy Teacup (Eddie Ryan & Charlie Sterling) vs Team H8 (Jeckel & Gideon)
Anybody new to Chaos may have been pretty confused at the start of this rematch by the arrival of Pariah Khan, the former owner, to deliver one of his typically lyrical ‘Public (Health) Service Announcements’. The reinvented ‘Doctor’ Khan — manager to the ‘crazy’ (Ryan, whose reactions in the promotion have been less than balanced) and the ‘teacup’ (Sterling, who arrived without his drinking vessel after Maltman smashed it last show) — had a plea of reconciliation for his former right-hand-man Jeckel. The superb throw-back was just a rouse however, so Ryan and Sterling made the most of their jump-start.
Team H8, Chaos’ resident gurus of Strong Style, were looking to replicate last month’s victory, but Khan’s counselling must have had an affect on Ryan as he appeared marginally more willing to co-operate with the overly-enthusiastic Sterling this time, and the pair mixed their high-impact and high-flying styles to good effect. Crazy Teacup got their maiden victory after Sterling’s impressive long-distance corkscrew, but that didn’t stop Ryan from ‘relapsing’ and superkicking his partner after the bell.
Jamie Hayter vs ‘Session Moth’ Martina
This was a rematch of a semi-final from the Maiden of Chaos tournament back in October between two of the stand-out competitors from that event, and a good reminder of why either of these women could be a challenge at any point for champion Jinny. The injured Maiden of Chaos joined the commentary team for this one.
Martina’s usual party-girl schtick was entertaining and welcomed as ever (especially by Rowan, her Chaos Club doppelganger), whilst Hayter’s ball-of-fury attitude and style seems to have developed nicely. Fury will only get you so far against Session Moth’s predictably unpredictable offence though, so it was a repeat result of last time. Martina got the pin after a womb-stone pile-driver. Not the most technically pioneering match on the card, but exquisitely executed.
NWA World Heavyweight Championship – Nick Aldis (c) vs Big Grizzly
The most historied title in the world of Pro-Wrestling made it’s debut in a Chaos ring, furthering Chaos’ own historic run of featuring top-level international championships from the likes of RoH, TNA, ICW and DDTPro. This bout though, both in intensity and style, could have fit in with the heyday of the belt, the reputation of which is slowly but surely being restored in its current incarnation. Grizzly ably demonstrated why he’s one of the UK’s premier super-heavyweights, with wince-inducing impacts and incredible mobility, whilst Aldis looked every inch the Adonis-like World-Champ that he is.
Grizzly’s high-arcing superplex was a stunning highlight, but the ending was marred by eye-gouging and low-blow belt shenanigans between the two competitors whilst Ref Paz was knocked down. This proved to be the turning point, and soon ended with Big Grizzly submitting to the Kings Lynn Cloverleaf. Aldis’ impressive reign continues.
‘Dirty’ Dick Riley vs Andrew Everett
Following the interval, where live stream viewers got to see some interviews with the talent, came the much anticipated match between the leader of the Aubergine Army, Dick Riley, and a year-long delayed debutant in Everett. In that time, Riley has failed to win a match in Chaos but every single outing has managed to pick up both plaudits and fans aplenty. To be fair, he has faced WWE UK Champion Pete Dunne, Marty Scurll and Will Ospreay recently, the latter two both holding the IWGP Junior Heavyweight belt when he fought them, so performance was always going to be more important than the result.
Comparatively, Impact star Everett looked marginally smoother than Ospreay did last month, although maybe not as inventive, but as usual that didn’t put Riley off his stride. With another high-octane, high-flying like-for-like match-up on the table for him again, he was on fire. Both guys gave it the guns, cracked out the ‘movez’, but Riley can finally put the ghosts of defeat to bed for the first time in a Chaos-calendar year.
Mark Haskins vs Beano
Another debut occurred in this bout, this time for British stand-out and former Progress champion, Mark Haskins. Beano, who spent most of last year tormenting Big Grizzly, showed his considerable mettle, and ability, against The Brotherhood’s James Drake and Nathan Bane before tasting defeat last month. If that match didn’t make people sit up and take notice of the young Dragon Pro student, then this one would have.
Haskins, renowned for his tight and hard striking and kicking as well as an excellent submission game, wasn’t taking his opponent lightly. The Malvern man launched into Beano, but the resilient Welshman gave as good as he got, as well as picking himself up from assaults that would have flattened half the roster. Beano also seemed to develop a knack of escaping Haskins’ arm-breaking submission hold quickly, which kept him in the game long enough to deliver a fantastic trademark draping neck-breaker. This was to be no ‘giant killing’ however, as Haskins’ experience allowed him to finally seize the opportunity and get the win. Beano can hold his head high after this match of the night and subsequent standing ovation though.
Mike Bird, Drew Parker & the Anti-Fun Police (Chief Deputy Dunne & Los Federales Santos Jr) vs The Brotherhood (James Drake, Nathan Bane & The Knights of Chaos, Joe Mezinger & Elijah)
Freebirding Knights of Chaos The Brotherhood have been running rampant over Pro Wrestling Chaos for a year or more now, and they’ve been having plenty of ‘fun’ at people’s (including Bird and Parker’s) expense. This has bought them to the attention of The AFP, who made their presence known after last month’s title match, much to the Chaos Club’s delight, even managing to co-opt the defeated contenders on their side for this month’s showpiece.
Like any good 8-man tag, this was fast and frenetic with the action periodically breaking down into a free-for-all. Pins were broken left-right-and-centre and the fighting regularly spilled to ringside. Seven of the eight men are well-known to the Chaos faithful, but Santos Jr introduced himself spectacularly: the high-flying super-heavyweight luchador has landed. On top of the Brotherhood via tope suicida.
Inevitably, it was chicanery on the part of The Brotherhood that settled the result as they introduced the tag belts to their opponents’ heads and quickly sealed the victory. They weren’t done there though. In another throw-back to last year, Drake brought out his Stanley knife to cut up the canvas again, prompting Chaos owner Dave Mercy to dive in to stop them. This only meant that he received a severe beat-down instead, with the Brotherhood walking off to the chant of “You’re getting sacked in the morning.” They’ll more than likely have to face their punishment in the ring, but we’ll just have to wait and see exactly what form that takes.